As I turn the pages of my family album, a stroll down memory lane, I couldn’t help but smile at my silly poses a my three year old birthday, my scowl for not winning a pageant, my huge grin in my school picture; I wouldn’t trade those photos for anything. They carry whole life. My first Christmas with my entire family, my first school dance, my first day on planet earth in mom’s womb and out. In the real world.
Don’t get me wrong, I am not old in fact I am still in high school and believe me I have a long way to go. But at times it helps to stop in stride and enjoy the view. I believe everyone should give themselves a pat on the back for getting here so far. For being them we best, for overcoming because it does not matter what you achieve in life if you do not enjoy the benefits of your strife.
Life is a bed of roses and it has thorns but we should try to enjoy it’s beauty no matter what.
Moving from Nigeria, there were a lot of things I expected to be different and many things I was going to leave behind but a few things followed me. They were not the traditional clothes, shoes and other little accessories my little suitcase could withhold. They were the stars.
Back in Nigeria, I would sit outside with my grandfather from dusk to the late night and I would pretend I were making a wish. There we would point at the sky, he would tell me folk tales and I would learn a thing or two about life. It was fun.
Now I am in a new country where sky scrapers obstruct most of the heaven but my favorite correlation, the three stars in a diagonal, are still there, stalking me.
Even though most things in my life has changed, I am no longer that little girl but a grown woman and have no time for star gazing, I always feel at home when I see them because then I know that somethings will never change.
Sometimes, I get tired of having to do so much because colleges want to see that I am well rounded and possess leadership skills.
Well, news flash colleges, one thing you would definitely not see is my blog because I cannot let you take everything I love away from me. Aren’t you tired of the cliches of sparkly resumes and well written essays that does not hold true for the heart?
It is true that I want my accomplishments and words to speak for me but I don’t want them to be temporary, I want them to mean something. Nobody wants to waste hours from their week for a college admissions officer to glance at for one minute. That only cheapens the activity, dishonors the commitment dedicated to the activity and makes it a “corrupt bargain”.
I want to run for Student President because I want to make changes in my school. I want to spend every Saturday at a soup kitchen or volunteer in a hospital because I hate how my society is. I don’t want to plaster on a fake smile and pretend to be someone I am not. That’s why my blog is one of my most cherished decisions I have ever made. I know that the people who read it will not seem as just another number but as someone who has a soul and is willing to “let it go”. (forgive me for all my allusions; sorry about that).
“Just try. If things get too hard, just pray and leave the rest to God.”
These were the words my mother said to me a year ago and even though her body decays in the hard soil six feet under, her words still resounds within me. Whenever I was sad because of a small failure I faced, she never hugged me or consoled me in any way, she would only berate me for letting my emotions get the best of me. She would say that by feeling down, I was failing to see the big picture. I did something wrong and I was not correcting it. She taught me to be thankful for mean teachers and love not being the best because then I would always grow and become better than I was yesterday. I loved her for being so direct with me and playing such a powerful role in my life. I know that I can face multiple obstacles because I was groomed to develop a thick shell. So I am not afraid of how many times I fall because I know that I can always get up and try again
My goal with this blog is to offend everyone in the world at least once with my words… so no one has a reason to have a heightened sense of themselves. We are all ignorant, we are all found wanting, we are all bad people sometimes.